By Katey Zeh
This is a thorough and convicting look at why people choose to have abortions and why they should be supported in their decisions. Katey shares many stories of people who have had abortions and the variety of reasons and complexities that go into their decision.
The reason that struck me the most—and the one I had overlooked the most—was the mental health of the person having the abortion. Sometimes pregnancy hormones can actually trigger suicidal thoughts and debilitating depression. Some pregnant people are unable to work and generate the income they need to support both themselves and their baby. They may choose to have an abortion to regain a healthy emotional state and return to work.
Another example was of a person in an abusive relationship that is trying to leave that relationship and start fresh. Having a baby with an abusive partner would make it a lot more challenging to break free from that relationship.
The timing of a conception can have a profound affect on whether a parent can continue studying, working and achieving their dreams. While this may on the surface sound selfish, there is also gender discrimination involved here as we know that people with vaginas and ovaries are the one who are more likely to be restricted by pregnancy, childbirth and even child-rearing, than, say, the person who does the impregnating.
The vast majority of people who have abortions, do not regret their abortion. They do, however, often need to grieve their abortion. Grief and regret are absolutely not the same. It is normal and valid to feel sadness over an ill-timed conception, or because a baby is not viable (not compatible with the world as we know it), or for any number of reasons, and yet still believe abortion to be the right choice. People who have experienced abortion, need compassion and support, not judgment and shame.
While this book is clearly a pro-choice argument and one that stresses compassion above all else, Katey states that in her ideal vision for the world no one would need an abortion. People would have access to universal health care; access to birth control and healthy sex-education; there would be paid parental leave from work after a baby is born; there would be more financial support for parents raising children; there would be top prenatal care regardless of gender, sexuality, race or other factors.
I am both pro-life and pro-choice. I deeply appreciated this book because it promotes grace, love, compassion and acceptance. This book seeks to reduce the need for abortion while affirming the right to have an abortion. It is an abuse to power to refuse a person the right to choose and restrict access to healthy abortion care.